a little kick

Last night, well technically this morning (2am) there was a man trying to break into our home via the back door. Had he not been scared and chased off by our next door neighbor who was letting their dog out for a potty break he would have been successful. I was actually up and heard the noise at the back door, but at 2am you can somehow justify that the noises you are hearing are either the wind or a stray cat. Because really, who doesn't have a stray cat on their back porch trying to unlock the door? Had the guy made it in, he would have ultimately been disappointed in scoring any type of valuable loot. The tv in my bedroom is from 1999 and I'm just glad it shows in color. Even the flat screen in the living room came from a pawn shop- how ironic would that have been if it had just ended up back in one? I don't have a game system, an Ipad, or an Iphone. ( Really, my phone is like one step above a jitter-bug.) The only jewelry I own is a ring made out of a quarter from 1964, and it's worth more than what's in my bank account at the moment. Seriously, I'm changing my name to Insufficient Funds because that's what shows up on all of my bank paperwork anyway. Had I come face to face with the intruder I'd probably have just told him to go to the neighbors across the street because they have a lot nicer stuff.  

So today finds us gun shopping. No matter your belief about guns, I have no desire to be Nancy Grace's next 8 o'clock special. On some level I am hesitant about having a gun simply because anyone that knows me knows that when I speak I use my hands emphatically so God only knows where the barrel would end up while I'm yelling "Stop!" or more realistically "oh shit!" Irregardless, the time has come where I must upgrade my golf club and mace for something with a little more kick because I understand that last night's incident could have gone very differently. 

I'm not sure what has happened to this guy to make him turn to criminal activity. Maybe he has fallen on hard times, or maybe he's just bad news? Whatever the case, I hope he is able to find his way back to a path of giving instead of taking.  

anything

Yes it is the inevitable "Back to School" blog. As a former teacher, I can't help but get a little nostalgic during this time and miss my old classroom terribly. The room I had with peeling paint and some unidentifiable stains on the one-time-clean carpet. I don't miss the roaches though, those things were so big even they carried book bags. It definitely wasn't the dog eating anyone's homework, it was those damn roaches eating the assignment before the dog had a chance! But even with it's worn out facade, that room was filled with magic. Nothing could impede on the imagination and creativity that came forth so strongly that it made it's way out of the classroom, down the halls, and into the real world.
My first "a-ha" moment in life came from my Kindergarten teacher. We were all sitting in the floor in a semi-circle around her, and Mrs. McCombs simply stated "You can be anything you want to be when you grow up." She was the first person who made me believe that I really could be anything I wanted to be and that it would all be possible. Educators are the fuel that light the lamp of knowledge. That symbol of education that represents the search for unyielding wisdom.
 I never took an art class, but the Art teacher at my high school had a smile and kind word for me everyday as my locker was near her classroom. I was blessed with two of the most amazing Spanish teachers anyone could ever ask for who gave me an appreciation for culture awareness. I had a middle school History teacher who gave me a passion for politics and once I make it into office (because I can be anything), I will always think of her while listening to the constituents. Along the way there have been other educators, each making their impression upon my soul, each igniting that everlasting lamp of knowledge.
 May we welcome this new school year with hope and promise for the teachers and students. May the creativity outweigh the often outdated learning environments. And may every student believe they can be anything they want to be. Thank you Mrs. McCombs.  

curve ball

  "Never look down on someone unless you're helping them up."
When I did a brief stint working for HUD I had hundreds upon hundreds of clients in just one little town. And I knew that if I had that many, the much larger city just south of me had thousands. It could've been so easy to look across my desk and to tell my clients that if they'd just go back to school, or if they'd just get a job, or if they'd just stop having kids... ugh or any of those other hurtful stereotypical responses that spew from so many. I'm not completely blind to the fact that yes there are those who do abuse the system. They exist and they cast a negative shadow on the establishment of assistance. Those that have no desire to better themselves, or those that feel an entitlement of sorts. Personally I do not understand the mindset of said individuals, however I do understand that there are those who are truly in need of assistance.
I had elderly clients whose retirement savings were just not enough to get by. I had disabled individuals whose bodies betrayed them from earning income. I had clients who had found themselves with nowhere to turn. I had clients that consisted of all types of ethnicities and familial make-up. There was no status-quo. I received phone calls everyday from people losing their jobs and their homes. People that had never needed assistance before in their lives were now on the other side of my desk.
And now it is on the other side of that desk I could easily find myself. Three years ago I had a very ungraceful and unfortunate accident which has left me with a most inconvenient back injury. Thirty plus procedures later and the doctors have uttered the words "permanently disabled."  Since I was 14 I've held numerous jobs and careers. I have two collegiate degrees, yet all because of one ten second event I have been unable to work for the last three years. I stay on a concoction of narcotics and muscle relaxers because "all we can do is make you comfortable." And while the State, the insurance companies, and the lawyers continue to fight everything out, I have found that my retirement was not enough for me to stop working at 31.
I write this blog entry not for pity because despite what the doctors have said I have hope.I have to have it. I write this because I have seen so many posts recently putting others down and I just want to remind people that you never know about the curve ball life may throw you. I write this because the next time you drive by a government housing development, or you see someone paying with their EBT card, or you see someone coming out of the health department, I want you to think of what "curve ball" must have occurred in  that person's life instead of putting them down. You never know when you might end up on the other side of the desk. And really, is it that hard to just be kind to each other?

scrape

I am very fortunate that anyone will put up with me for 8 minutes let alone 8 years, alas it's true though because my partner has been with me for 8 years and tomorrow is her birthday. In the words of Ouiser from Steel Magnolias she "must be on some mission from God."
And ever if the words "opposites attract" were true, then that depicts us to a tee. We're ying & yang, light & dark, right & left - you get the picture. We really couldn't be any more different yet it works. While I'm reading Vogue she's reading Handyman's Workshop. If I were ever recruited to be on Survivor I'd want to take her as my one item. In the first 15 minutes of being on the island, she'd not only have a shelter built, but a row of condos. I on the other hand would have a sunburn and about three thousand bug bites. I don't do outside very well. In fact I don't do a lot well. I have attempted to cook, but then there was that call to poison control. I've tried to do laundry, but they're serious when they say to separate your lights and darks. I've even tried to hook up the dvd player, but those extra sparks were not supposed to be there. So I do what I can, which is um, well I'll get back to you on that.
Anyway, tomorrow is her birthday and while the cupcakes I will make her will undoubtedly be burnt, she will just scrape until she finds the good stuff- kinda like what she has done with me. I love you hunny bunny. Happy Birthday.

price-check

The following may or may not have happened. It could be a purely hypothetical situation, yeap that's what I'm going with...
Ok so when you have to go to the store to buy something embarrassing like let's hypothetically say hemorrhoid cream, you totally look around for something else to buy too. You don't want all the focus to be on that one single item, so you pick up something else completely random like a loaf of bread. You don't even know if you need bread at home, and you're not going to buy just any loaf either. Nope, you're going to get the king size loaf because even though no one is actually paying you any attention, you want to make sure that the bread is the only thing anyone sees. To make matters worse, you may have a back injury so you already walk funny...
So you proceed to the checkout hoping you can find one without someone else in line and at the same time praying that no one else walks up behind you at said check out. Although the clerk is probably 16 so he more than likely has no idea what hemorrhoid cream is and even if he did he could care less about any issues you may have. Seriously, he just cares about what time his shift ends.
After nonchalantly stalking the check-out lanes, at least you think you're being nonchalant, in fact the security cameras have probably picked up the fear in your eyes so now management is watching you thinking you're about to steal a ginormous loaf of bread. You really don't want to be tackled to the ground for bread since you know what it's hiding. Headline News: Pain in the Ass Criminal Taken Down.
The coast is finally clear, you choose your lane and internally you breathe a sigh of relief because the clerk is indeed 16. The bread goes through without a hitch! Butt, um but of course the cream refuses to scan. Yes, you managed to pick out the only box with a scratched barcode. Attention to the one item you so desperately did not want to be seen has been thrust up front and center into the spotlight! You should have just went for all or nothing and picked up some feminine hygiene products, adult diapers, and anti-diarrheal medicine too.
 At first the 16yr old is determined to make it scan. You know it's futile, because this is your life. And while he's trying to get it to scan, a line undoubtedly forms behind you. You now have witnesses. Next, the inevitable occurs "I need a manager on 4 because I have some Preparation H that's not ringing up. It's the family size box with with the extra large applicator."  Thus the awkward silence begins while not only you, but the line behind you waits for a price too. At this point you just want to throw a $100 bill at the clerk and run, but then you realize you're poor and you don't have $100.
There are those moments in life when you want the world to open up and swallow you whole. This would qualify as one of those moments. Hypothetically of course.

the letter S

One of my all time favorite quotes by Maya Angelou is : There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside of you.
And it's so true, because it is our own personal stories of failure and triumph that can help others. I have two very dear friends that literally live continents apart, yet they have started a movement that has eclipsed their distance and it has traveled to all the corners of the world. Their website is http://uglyducklingsinc.com/ and it provides a safe haven for anyone young or old to tell their story. The website was inspired by Jennifer Morrison's character role of Emma Swan in ABC's Once Upon A Time. If you haven't seen the show or are unfamiliar with it, PLEASE lie to me and say that you have. It's a show that encompasses all of the complexities of family, love, and loss while set against the backdrop of every fairytale story you've ever read. I mean seriously, the town is called StoryBrooke. How clever is that? Anyway, just watch the show because it's kick axe (seven dwarfs reference.) Jennifer Morrison gave her fans the moniker The Ugly Ducklings and thus the website was born.
So what makes an Ugly Duckling? It is someone who despite what life has thrown at them, they have succeeded. It is someone who has not let life harden them and instead they have taken their own personal tragedies and used them to help others. We all have a story and when we start sharing, then that's when the healing begins. Your story just may be someone else's story too. And you'll see that you don't have to play a super-hero or a story book character on t.v. to maybe save someone.So today's blog is brought to you by the letter "S" because eventually all ugly ducklings grow up to be Swans.

after all

Ok, so this is my first blog entry ever. And it may end up being my last as well since I really have no idea what to write about. I mean, I talk alot in real life so I should be able to type alot too? But is what I say in real life all that interesting? I don't know? I'm sure there is the occasional person that glazes over during conversations, hell, sometimes I glaze over when it's me doing the talking. Anyway, I am going to try this "blog" thing. Yes, I'm only about 10yrs coming into this too late, but why not? Who knows I may just have something important to say after all!